There are many shades of gray when it comes to texting your ex back after you break up with them. There is no black and white in regards to this. However, you do need to make sure you aren’t playing games. Emotions can run high and you need to make sure you take the time to really think about if you want to remain in contact with them.
Think about why you broke up with that person. If they were good to you but you both have different goals then it may be for the best you aren’t a couple. However, that doesn’t mean you don’t have feelings for them or that you don’t want to remain friends with them. It doesn’t mean you don’t care about what goes on in their life.
Never text your ex back if you are just feeling lonely. You may miss the good times with them but if there were more bad times that you had to let them go, don’t get wound up in that again. It can be hard to do it but call a friend instead. Don’t text them when you have been drinking or because you would like to have sex with them. Have more respect for yourself and for them.
You want them Back
Do you have regrets now and wish you could get back together with your ex? Maybe you aren’t sure what they will think about that. Texting them that you make a mistake and you would like to talk isn’t a bad idea. It lets that person know how you feel and it gives them time to think about how they wish to respond to you. It also makes both of you less vulnerable than if you were to tell them that information face to face.
What do they want?
Since you broke up with your ex, you were in control over that. Give them control over the communication that remains in place. If you want to text them, ask their permission. If they aren’t comfortable with it, you need to respect that. Let them know if they change their mind about it though they can initiate contact with you and it will be welcomed.
If you broke up with them, they may have lots of unresolved feelings and questions they would like to have answered. If your ex is texting you and asking things, you can choose to answer them or not. Try to be honest but make sure you aren’t too harsh or that you lead them on if you have no intention of getting back with them. They may be in need of closure and they feel that by texting you it is the best means of communication at that point in time.
If you aren’t comfortable with it, set limits. Ask them not to text you anymore if you really don’t want to have any contact with them. You can also tell them that certain topics are off limits and that you don’t want to talk about the relationship.